But it's okay now. Today was one of those well-groomed, fresh, clean days. I worked for five hours this morning, had pizza for breakfast, quesadillas for lunch and then took a three hour nap. No homework. Save it for tomorrow.

Of course I did have to try to get the stingy yuppies to donate a measly dollar to the March of Dimes (which few were willing to do) and got a little stressed with the complete lack of charity. Fuckers. And then I lost control of my car coming home. A little scary. Obviously I'm still alive.

But the deoderant I needed was on sale for a dollar and I got some new lotion. It was a good day.

Cedar wrote me a benign little email telling me that she was just killing time before she went to hang out with a bunch of other people. Benign my ass. She knew that if she sent me a little nothing email, I would write her back repenting for all of my sins against her and confessing that I am nothing but a masochistic piece of shit. And she knew that I would cry while I wrote it.

Damn sadist.

Or maybe she really was just killing time . . .

I bought some eyeliner today, too, which may seem like a boring purchase to some. But what it means to me is that I am making another attempt to recover from this wretched laziness that plagues my life and keeps me form doing things like looking slightly feminine, which I enjoy but end up sitting around on my ass too much to do. In short, the eyeliner prompted yet another list of personal goals:

1) Stop watching so much goddamn tv. I hate everything I watch on tv, but I still manage to sit there for hours like an idiot. As a sign of hope, I have successfully recovered from my addictions to both er and the Real World in a relatively short amount of time.

2) Start journaling on a daily basis. I like keeping a journal (I'm not talking about this one) but I'm really bad at it. It's not that fucking hard, Anna. Especially when you manage to maintain an endless list of shit to bitch about.

3) Try to develop some sort of grooming routine. Take care of yourself. You know, wash your face everyday so you don't suffer from satan's breakouts. Use lotion so your skin doesn't look like a goddamn desert. Get a haircut that looks decent. Muster up the energy to shave every once and awhile.

4) Put some thought into what you wear. It's shallow, but you know you like to have nice clothes and at least think that you look hot.

5) Why is it that I can never come up with a fifth goal? All I want is a well-rounded list of 5 goals and I can only ever come up with four. Damn my neurotic tendencies.

Okay. Now I've got something to strive for during the next two or three days before I conveniently forget about all of my goal making. Whatever.

Kim, why is it that everytime I go to read your diary you still only have those two entries? You know I get bored easily. Get on it damnit! Love you, honey.

[smile and growl]

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