The previous entry was an incredible waste of time. I can't write about interesting events because they are interesting in their own right. In telling you about last night, all I can do is outline the events that took place. I can't make them any more interesting than they actually were. My art lies in making non-issues (such as myself and sperm donation) seem interesting. Or at least, make you want to continue reading.

My day felt like such a waste. I got up at one, showered, ate and went to work until ten. And then I had coffee with Jenna and Tyler, which was good (great little gift from Tyler), and now it's midnight and I have to work at eight tomorrow. What made my day seem like a waste was not the events that took place. It was more of a time issue. I'm really sick of having to be out and about during the day. Daytime is only cars and phone calls and idiots. You don't get anything more done during the day than you can during the night (except things like banking, but there's the late afternoon for that)

There were nasty lesbians at Perkins when we were there. Everywhere I turn in this goddamn town there are nasty lesbians. It's some sick joke from the higher power I don't believe in who wants me to feel tortured and dread my adult life. I don't want much. No sports, no flannel, no mullets, no Melissa Etheridge [cringe]. But there they are . . . everywhere I go. Have I ever mentioned how much I despise Melissa Etheridge? She's gross, horrid music, and yet America's lesbian population flocks to her. Why? This is why no one respects us. How do expect anyone to take you seriously when the mainstream image of an american lesbian is Melissa fucking Etheridge. What's wrong with all you nasty lesbians? If I can never find anything better than these nasty midwestern dykes, that's fine. I'll just never have sex.

Day two of the war and I don't really have anything to say about any of this. Cedar got defensive the other day when we were at Perkins and I said that all their little peace rallies on the corner were just social gatherings (because they were). I mean, do think anybody who matters really gives a shit about who and how many want to go to war or not? No. It's pretty obvious that the president doesn't give a damn about a handful of neo-hippies sitting on the corner across from the Shopko parking lot with a couple of signs. Is it a political statement? Well, yeah, as much as gay pride parephenilia is. Not that I don't give a fuck at all-- I do care on some scale-- but for the most part, I think it's all pretty pointless. Gay pride is just advertising and weekly rallies are just social gatherings. Might as well call it what it is. I watched about fifteen minutes of a peace rally on tv the other day and in that span of time, they discussed the entire liberal agenda-- gay rights, free Palestine, free Mumia, feminism and, oh yeah, no war in Iraq. Pick a fucking focus. I think we're all so bored right now that people just wish it was 1970 and something interesting was happening. I think people subconciously want Vietnam over again so that they can be radical heroes too. They think that maybe that will give their life meaning. It won't. Just get a fucking hobby. Learn to knit. Read a book. Go antique shopping. Write haiku. Or you could get together all of your peace rally buddies and have a drum circle. How's that sound?

I hate wasting time and I hate bullshit. And there seems to be a lot of bullshit that's wasting a lot of my time. Doesn't mean I don't think peace is important, doesn't mean I'm not pissed off because we have the stupidist fucker leading our country, but it DOES mean that I'm tired of listening to idiots engaging in purposeless activism.

I'm feeling very confined knowing that the time for sleep is growing shorter and shorter since the time that I must be awake has been dictated by my employer. My body was not made to fit this nine to five schedule.

Yet another sign that I was not meant to be part of this society . . .

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