That's my sigh of relief as the clock strikes midnight and signifies the end of what proved to be a very good day. I had a completely pain-free day at work and then came home to find out that the only thing wrong with my car was that it needed new spark plugs and I was able to go and pick it up that afternoon. Then I went to the grocery store to get some speghetti sauce and while standing in the express lane (which was not moving very fast at all) I had a lesbian bonding moment with the woman behind me. She spent a hell of a long time checking me out and then when I finally turned around and faced her, we discussed our piercings and tattoos. It was the matching dyke-y black tank tops that brought us together. And, of course, tonight was the premier of the new season of Real World (my tv vice). Simon is so fucking beautiful. His mere presence on the show has become my reason to continue watching.

Bridget was also a major contributor to my good day. She has emailed me 4 times in the last 48 hours. Insanity. She sent me two yesterday about making plans for Friday night and then I just got one from her about half an hour ago saying that she had forgotten that Friday night was her best friend's graduation party so she we're going to have to plan for another night. (I made her forget about her best fucking friend since birth. How d'ya like them apples?)

She also emailed me this afternoon to a) bitch about her job doing housekeeping at the hotel that her parents own, b) tell me that she missed seeing Megan, Ruby and I and c) tell me that she really has been thinking about me a lot lately and still likes me. Apparently she's beginning to feel a little more confident about the whole thing and even wrote: "i'm confused . . . but this is my last summer before college . . . and well . . . what do i have to lose right? (besides a lot of my friends, and some other stuff . . . but that's beside the point)" I find the contradictions in her thinking to be incredibly endearing. She's so damn dorky. And that's what I'm beginning to find so appealing about her. I used to just think she was hot. Isn't outward appearance what all good hormonal crushes are based upon? But now that I'm no longer feeling like "she makes me wanna die," I'm excited at the prospect of being around her. She doesn't really make nervous anymore and I can actually talk to her and have something to say. Or I can not say anything and not feel awkward.

So anyway. With me just wanting to laugh at her and Bridget not being so damn scared of the fact that she likes me, this may prove to be an interesting summer. But interesting is as far as it's going to go and this is something that I really have set in my mind and am not just telling myself because it's smart. Because I'm not going to spend my freshmen year of college pining after a girl who is not only a state away, but who can't really make her mind up about the way that she feels. Or at least can't decide if she wants to play it safe or jeopardize the opinions of a shitload of people who essentially don't matter so that she can find who she really is. So I hope that she isn't expecting to just say "Okay, I'm ready" and I'll come running. And I don't think that she is, but I don't know. I think I'm just getting ahead of myself.

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